Lesson for 2023- Learning to accept IMPERFECTIONS in life.
Life is not perfect.
People are not perfect.
My family is not perfect.
My church is not perfect.
I am not perfect.
So why am I constantly trying to make things look perfect?
Was sharing this thought during a sharing session in church when someone introduced me to this idea called Wabi-Sabi. A concept in design and architecture to accept and appreciate imperfections. That got me to start googling and reading up on Wabi-Sabi and I'm amazed by how simple and logical the concept is.
We are imperfect beings in an imperfect world but if we know how to appreciate the beauty in it, we will find value in every crack or unevenness in life.
We are imperfect and we live in an imperfect world. Yet, we still get sucked into this endless pursuit of wants and desires and filling our lives with little 'perfections' in order to make it look 'perfect'. Life will be imperfect. Who gets to determine our lives are perfect or not anyway? 🤷♂️ Are we gonna compare our own lives with those whom we deem as having 'perfect lives'? Once we do that, our lives will never be perfect in our own narrow eyes. Appreciate the beauty of our own lives DESPITE the imperfections. In every crack and unevenness and ugliness, there is value and something for us to be thankful for. 🙏
My family is not perfect. I am definitely not the perfect father and neither is my wife the perfect mother. And my kids... 🤫 🤐 🙊 As parents, we have never promised nor strive to build a perfect family and give our kids perfect lives. Though they did not get tuition until P6, if you count that as an imperfection 🙄 Instead, there were many times we shared why we couldn't get this or pay for that or go for this nor let them do that. We taught them to enjoy every moment of life, be thankful and appreciate what we have, despite its imperfections, and not complain about what we don't have. Usually I'm the last to go to bed and each night, I will remind myself to go into the kids' room, stroke their faces, and thank God for each of them, including their imperfections. Don't try to make your kids perfect and make them feel less worthy of your love because they are imperfect.
My church is not perfect.
I am imperfect. That's why I go to church. Church is full of imperfect people. That's why the church is imperfect. No church is perfect.
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?” Matthew 7:1-3 NKJV
I am not perfect.
And I don't seek to portray myself as perfect.
I admit that when I first started wanting to learn about accepting imperfections at the start of 2023, I was thinking of not taking things too hard in life and lower my expectations on others. This is arrogance.
Wabi-Sabi means to accept imperfections and appreciate the beauty and be thankful for them. This is humility. This is what I need to learn.
Slow down my pace of life and be more observant about people around me and my surroundings.
Take more walks than runs.
Spend more time with nature.
Even if I am the first to leave the office, just leave when it's time and I know I am done with work for the day. Don't linger at the office just to create the impression of busyness.
Take care of my own body, health and mental well-being.
Life will be imperfect after all. Why try so hard to keep 'perfecting life'?
Do your best. It may not be perfect, that's ok. If you feel you have done your best, it is time to celebrate and let your body and mind relax.
Have the courage to change what you can. It may still not be perfect, that's ok. Stop thinking that the world expects anything of you all the time.
Learn to accept that there will be things that you cannot change. You may not be the one to effect those changes and it may not even need to be changed at all! Even if it's not perfect, it's ok. These imperfections are what spices life up. It is through these imperfections that we grow.
It's ok not to be perfect. The best things in life are almost always FAR FROM PERFECT.